My Promise to Myself

                          My Promise to Myself ... by Dawn Saul

My beloved son is always in my thoughts and prayers. I enjoy great comfort knowing he is forever blissful in Heaven's sky! This gift calms and consoles this Mother’s weary heart. Even though I still experience bouts of depression, anger and dismay; I embrace the good days! Happily, I can report  in the two years since his passing there are less tears and more joy. I find little things to smile about. Sometimes, I find myself sharing memories of my son and laughing about one of his ridiculous escapades!

I  believe what is most difficult for bereaved parents  is the feeling of being disconnected from their children. It is a cavernous void as a parents scattered heart longs to be reunited with their child. I was in such shock and anguish when Jimmy died that I couldn't feel his presence.  Now, I know when he is near. I  had to relax, trust and allow the process of healing. It helps to remember... ‘Like  Love itself, the Soul NEVER dies.’  Understanding this is my saving grace! The most direct route between despair and hope is faith.  My promise to myself is that I have chosen heal instead of suffer!